Wardrobe Taming

For literally years, I have been planning on doing Gala Darling's Wardrobe Taming Series. I helped my sister do Day One on her (MASSIVE) wardrobe last week. I haven't gotten to the doing part for myself yet (I forced myself to finish my Christmas Cards first), but I DID make sure to wear almost everything I took from my sister's get rid of pile, this week. I have started taking daily photos so that I can analyze what I do & don't look good in. I don't have a full length mirror. I also don't have internet at home and keep forgetting to transfer the photos - but I did get three from this week up on my Flickr Wardrobe Set. I would also love to be able to post to wardrobe_remix, but I'm definitely only going to post the really good ones; I get tired of looking at people's boring everyday outfits up there.


It's one of my 4 Simple Goals to do the Wardrobe Taming. My reward to myself for completion is going to be ALL NEW WOODEN HANGERS. I still have hot pink, peach, & turquoise plastic hangers from 1st grade. I deserve better! But only once my wardrobe is tamed.

No longer in Suburbia!

We moved to the West Side of Olympia about a month ago!!!! We are no longer in suburbia & life is sooooooo good. We live in a very small post-war era duplex. We can walk downtown! Jogging in our new neighborhood is so interesting! Plus the sidewalks are uneven and there are actually hills, which is great for exercise. We still need to bring home our records from Kaden's parents' house, and get a new needle, and hang our pictures (we have found we have too many). Also have been getting rid of a lot of stuff on Craigslist! Total thrill.

There have been some very exciting events lately: The Night of the Living Tribute Bands show on Halloween; the very first Wild Flag show; The Need & The Gossip after The Decline of Western Civilization at the Olympia Film Festival ALL IN WALKING DISTANCE. And we walk to the food co-op all the time (we're becoming hippies). LOVE living on the West Side!

These are the only two photos of the new place I have:

Hiking in style.

Since spring of 2008, Kaden and I have spent as many weekends as possible hiking in Washington's wilderness areas. We have seen some AMAZING THINGS. In Washington we are having this phenomenal Indian Summer right now and have been so lucky to go to two of the most beautiful places which ended up being my two favorite hikes ever in the past two weeks: Summerland Meadow at Mt. Rainier and Gothic Basin in the North Cascades.


I started out my hiking career in jeans & t-shirts & running shoes, but my hiking style & gear have improved greatly since then. I have become a stickler for moisture-wicking fabrics. Under Armour is my preferred brand (I'm a sucker!!!), though Champion has great cheap stuff at Target. I recently invested in a pair of $50 spandex pants. There is something I NEVER imagined I would do in my life! Since I wear them jogging, to yoga class, and hiking, they are totally worth it. I'm in love.


Wearing:

Shoes: Bear Paw (Big 5). I had a pair of cheap boots that had more ankle support, but they literally felt like shackles, I couldn't wear them. I got these for only $20 and they have lasted me through 3 years of hiking. They are so comfortable, they feel like slippers. But, they aren't waterproof, and my fear of getting my feet wet caused me to sprain my foot trying to jump over a stream last January! I just purchased Merrell Siren Sport GORE-TEX boots from zappos, and I am really excited to try them out.

Shirt: Under Armour (REI). Love the color; love the collar. Wicks moisture! I consider $30 expensive, but totally worth it!

Backpack: North Face (North Face Outlet, Wisconsin). It's kind of a stupid size, a little too big for a day pack and a little too small for overnight backpacking. Plus it doesn't have padded hip straps. I need a new backpack.

Jacket: New Balance (Fred Meyer). I love this white track jacket. Wicks moisture! Really sturdy; I've worn it for over 2 years. Zips up to "turtleneck" for cooler weather. I always take many extra layers hiking because I tend to get cold easily & can't have a good time if I'm cold!

Leggings: Under Armour (Sports Authority). These are the best pants I've ever owned. They have a "yoga pants" type waistband that is soooooooo comfortable. They are tight around my knees which I love, since baggy knees are a problem I always have with leggings. They're a little long, but I like it that way.

Socks: Columbia (Fred Meyer). I wear these with a thin pair of "dress socks" underneath (Kaden read a recommendation to do this in one of his hiking guides & I love it!). I think it would look cooler if I left them inside my pant legs, but wearing them outside I get mud from my boots on the socks instead of the pants, and if I don't have to wash the pants after every hike they'll last longer.

I also always wear a bandana to keep my bangs out of my eyes - I cannot stand that when I'm outdoors. Not pictured, obviously, is my sports bra, but I stand by Champion brand from Target - totally comfortable, reasonably priced ($16.99 instead of $40 like Under Armour).

This great ensemble, with a rain coat & water proof pants stuffed in my bag, allows me to be ready for anything in the wilderness. I also feel really athletic & sexy in it, and that's an improvement on the cargo pants & muscle-t style moisture-wicking shirts I used to wear hiking. I highly recommend & endorse all of these items for ladies who enjoy outdoor excursions!


PARTY BONUS! A most excellent post on women's hiking attire by Mary Van Note, i heart vintage hiking!!

Clutter Clearing.

Clutter clearing is something I have worked on, on & off, since 2005, when I read Clear Your Clutter with Feng Shui. I have seen some incredible results in my life. I owe my job at Gorham Printing to my first clutter clearing session. We used to live with James on Milroy Street. There was a sunroom and my table was in there. I have this vague memory of it being completely covered in about a foot of stuff. I didn't know what was in that pile then, and I don't now. But I know I got rid of it, went on a roadtrip, came home and interviewed and got the hell out of food service. The following summer we had a garage sale, where we sold very little, and then carted 7 car loads of, again, I don't know what, to Goodwill.

When we moved to Bellingham, we put out piles of stuff on the curb for months. It all got taken away by people who walked or drove by! Putting out a free box is one of the big thrills in life, I think.

This past March, I got the book Clutter Busting. I always say the same thing about this book: the stories are mega-corny, but, for whatever reason, it lit a fire under my ass. Over a few weeks I went through just about everything in our apartment in Bellingham. I truly feel that it was one of the best periods of my life; I felt so invigorated. Kaden worried that I was freakin out, and also felt like I was neglecting our personal relationship, which surprised the hell out of me, because I felt so good I assumed he could see and feel it.

The concept of clutter clearing, for me & for many, is that letting go makes room for something better in your life.

I went through my file cabinet. My files are kinda precious to me. They are funny. I read so much of my old writing and I loved it. I got rid of every thing in my "High School" folder except my SAT scores. I had one unlabeled file - it would have been labeled with (and was in alphabetical order according to) the name of my ex-girlfriend from when I was 17. It was unlabeled because I didn't want it to seem creepy if Kaden ever happened to look in my file cabinet. Our relationship had ended very poorly and we had not really had contact in 9 years. Yet I had every card & letter she'd written me, drawings she had done, a copy of her resume, photos of us together, and dirty photos of us together. It took me a lot of thought and consideration, journal writing and even coaching from my BFF Cree to decide what to do with the contents of the folder. I finally recycled everything, tearing the nude photos into shreds for legal (not emotional) reasons. I held onto this cool drawing she did of The Need for a couple extra days, but finally let that go too.

Then we found out The Need were playing a reunion show. Just a couple days before the show, my ex-girlfriend added me to her facebook friends. We messaged back & forth & everything was cool! We hung out at the show! I was very pleased, also, to find myself completely NOT attracted to her, but enjoying her company. I let go of some pieces of paper and it healed that spot of confusion & regret that I had harbored so long.

Remarkable.

All you have to do is ask.

Sometimes all you have to do is ask. Today I feel so much more whole & receptive to ideas that have sort of stumped me lately. Autumn is OK on its own terms.

I have also had this big issue (in my head only) about "being cool." Of course this new book about Riot Grrrl came out; I bought it right away. I care about riot grrrl. Then of course, I am in/from Olympia & the author is having an event at the Olympia library and of course I want to go. But there is something, right in the center of my chest, indicating that I am not cool enough to be there, that I have no right to be there, that everyone there will know that I shouldn't be there. Now of course that is absolutely irrational etc etc. I told Kaden about the event and he was all excited about going and was like "You don't seem very excited." And I got all defensive/aggressive like "You don't think I'm cool enough to go." There was a time when I felt like my mere presence in Olympia & at shows made me cool enough. And later a time when I felt like my knowledge of music made me cool enough. I'm not a networker - I don't seek out getting to know people. Back in Bellingham I met a girl who was organizing the Bellingham Ladyfest. She invited me to a feminist group "No Bra Time" & an "all girl noise collective." But I definitely did not go or really even consider going because I don't dress like that group of people.

It really all comes down to appearance, I realize now that I am writing this. I don't have that DIY atmosphere to my style; if I did it would be a put-on and that would be even less cool.

But today, like I say, I feel more receptive - I feel like I can go to the Riot Grrrl book event. I feel like I can dress right to be there. I felt like I looked so out of place at the first Need show in Olympia in July (but I know I looked fine!); the second night (in Portland) I dressed right & felt like I had the right to be there. On a personal level, for me inside, it IS about appearance. I wrote in a comment on a blog responding to a question about what outfit made me feel the best, that I felt best when I went to concerts dressed in a way that expressed my connection to the music & my connection to the other fans. And that is true for me. I care about riot grrrl, I care about The Need, I care about rock & roll & feminism. And if dressing a certain way can allow me to be in these places on an emotional level, it's worth it to make that effort.

I am embarrassed to write all of this. Especially now that spell check just informed me that I have spelled embarrassed wrong MY WHOLE LIFE. Hahahaha, anyway - the personal is the political ETC ETC.

When I was 10 and 11, and my parents owned a copy business in downtown Olympia, I would watch all the street kids with dyed hair, who my parents probably mistakenly identified to me as Evergreen students. I wanted to be like them sooooooooo bad, but I was just a little kid, and the oldest in my family besides, with literally no role model for "cool". Everything I liked I had to find by myself. When I was 15 and 16 and 17 and first into riot grrrl, and when the original Ladyfest happened, I just assumed that I would grow older and automatically be a part of this group of people. And I grew older, but my being a kinda shy kinda outsider didn't change. I found Kaden and we are like, kindred spirits & equally cool, but, he doesn't have the sort of inferiority complex I have. [another example is that every year he wants to go to the Rockabilly Ball at the Tractor. I always tell him we cannot go. We do not have nice enough clothes and we do not know how to dance]. When I look at it in this way, I am lugging around "emotional baggage" (hahaha) from WHEN I WAS 10! And it's not even, like, something traumatic.

I am just going to give it up and BE COOL DAMN IT.



Speaking of such things, here is a little article titled you're already perfect. I can definitely use this right now. I still struggle every day with the reality that I am living in a brand new suburban neighborhood in Lacey. I still have not accepted it; I still view my life in Bellingham as "perfect" and the life I have been living since June as insufficient. I could give a million explanations & reasons, but they would all be inaccurate. My life is perfect, as it is, at the beginning of autumn, in a new suburban neighborhood in Lacey, planning to attend the riot grrrl book event, right now.

The universe is providing endless support for what I am exploring here! I just found this quote on Urban Weeds.

"The goal is to dress for yourself, but not ever be embarassed to leave the house and never try too hard." - Emily, designer & owner of Filly Designs

P.S. LOOK THEY MISSPELLED EMBARRASSED TOO!!! (one "r")

Indian Summer/Ovulation.

I'm in that feeling of nameless wanting. Wanting to see new things & feel new feelings. Wanting to go places & make things & nest in my own home.


Oh wait, I think that's called ovulation. How do you get excited about autumn instead of dreading it? I read a blog where a girl said "this autumn is going to be magical." We are having a crazy Indian Summer in the Pacific Northwest right now, but I want it to be summer forever.

Aquamarine/Right Now.

When designing our custom-made wedding rings, I decided, for no reason besides it's "milky" appearance, that I wanted to use aquamarine. Since then, I have fallen in love with it. Furthermore, Laila made me a BEAUTIFUL aquamarine necklace, which I wore at the wedding, and have wanted to wear just about every day since then. It is the perfect length (rests just about at my collarbone), and is elegant without being fancy or precious. I was curious about what kind of power or influence wearing this gem might have on my life, and this is what I discovered.


via annemeplon.com
Aquamarine
Aligns the etheric and mental bodies. It assists one in honoring their spiritual experiences as their own and using those experiences to further their own growth.
Physical: Cleanses the physical body by directly strengthening the organs that perform that function. It strengthens and flushes the lymphatic system.
Emotional: Reduces fear and stimulates self expression. Helps one to communicate compassionately and to feel safe while moving through the changes of life.

I think that is just perfect for me right now.

Olympia is Better.

Compared to Bellingham, Olympia has better dressed people; plays better music in restaurants, bookstores, coffee shops, and record shops (but Bellingham has better food). In the record store they were playing Psychedelic Sounds of the 13th Floor Elevators followed by Is This Real by the Wipers, and it was funny/weird/awesome because several years ago Kaden bought both those records at the same time and we used to get drunk & stoned & look at the covers side b’ side & trip out about their congruency.

(they look more similar in color on our record sleeves at home)
Plus I fucking forgot how amazing Psychedelic Sounds is. Kaden borrowed some really nice early 90s speakers from my parents that were in a storage shed. They sound SO GOOD compared to my gotten-for-free speakers we've been using for years. We need a new record needle though; we also need our own home to listen to records in.

In other news, I am going to start completely & fully supporting EVERYONE in EVERYTHING they say they want to/are going to do. I see a pattern in my life of trying to talk people down from their dreams. I would like to think it is because I am trying to protect them from disappointment, but it is more likely that I am, on some inner level, jealous because I do not have a plan or a dream, and I never really have. I don't see anything wrong with not having a plan or a dream - I let the universe decide for me, and I've always had most excellent luck. But now that I recognize that I have had that pattern, I am going to make a change and be the best supportive, loving, enthusiastic encourager I can be!

Blowing my Mind.

Today is like the best day ever. My mind is being blown by many things.

First, Riot Grrrl is the theme for the week. I started reading The Style Rookie after seeing an article about her in The New Yorker. This led me to the realization that RIOT GRRRL IS REALLY HOT RIGHT NOW. I read on Kathleen Hanna's blog that she feels more supported now than she ever did while Bikini Kill was performing.

Second, there is all this NEW CURRENT music that is BITCHIN. Kaden fell in love last night (on amazon.com) with Black Angels ("neo-psychedelic drone rock"). They are playing a tour in November with Black Mountain and (!!!!!!!!!!!????????????!!!!!!!!!!!!) it is called "The Dropout Boogie" tour! Of course Dropout Boogie (or as I like to call it Drop Out Boogie) is a phrase very near & dear to me, as I have called myself that online for several years! The Black Angels singer (male?) sounds just like Grace Slick! In other music news, this other band we listened to, which I read about in last week's Stranger, is Grass Widow. They're like "Quix*o*tic but not quite as dark", or, Twee, as Kaden called them.

I am so excited, like, physically excited about this new music. Still diving deeper into Avi Buffalo AND I just ordered "EVOL" on 180g vinyl.

Third: PJ Harvey just gets younger & more gorgeous as the years go by!

Hitched.

Rev. Claire, Liina, Kaden.
We got hitched without a hitch!!! More photos in our Koivula-Jelsing Wedding Set on flickr.

Love & Marriage.

September 18, 2010 by Hotel Hell

Kaden & I are getting married on September 18. I have been referring to it as "my semi-secret micro wedding." It took us a very long time (nearly 7 years) to decide to have a ceremony with family & friends. Marriage vows seem to me an exceptionally intimate exchange, and still, with 9 days left, I don't necessarily want to do this in front of even the 16 people invited. But I will, because it is important to them. And I'm sure it will be fun. Cree & Kristina are preparing the food - build your own sandwiches & salad bar. Bearded Lady Food Company is providing the cake! It will be almond poppyseed. We are holding it at Kaden's parents house in Woodinville. Their long-time next door neighbor, Claire, will be the Officiant; we've created our own brief ceremony & simple vows. My sister, Laila, has been so incredible & sweet to me during this planning process. She works at David's Bridal, but knows me well & knows I am not looking for traditional &/or excessively materialistic themes. In fact we are trying to keep this event as LOW BUDGET AS POSSIBLE. I am really interested to see what the grand total comes out to be. Anyway I wanted to be casual ("this is an informal event, please dress however you feel most comfortable") but on a whim I tried on this INCREDIBLE POOFY DRESS (at David's Bridal)...and it was THE ONE. So what can you do. I'm wearing it with white Chucks. Laila is decorating a veil for me - and it is SO AMAZING. She is very humble about it, but it is so beautiful; she has been so creative! I can't stop showering her with thanks.

Today we are getting our marriage license. Meeting with Melanie & Jordan about the cake. Picking up our rings, which were hand crafted by a local jewelry artist.

We FINALLY last night figured out what we're going to do for our "honeymoon." Since we planned this on very short notice - deciding on the date only a month ago - and since we work at the same company right now, we can't take an extended vacation. So we're thrilled to be spending a night at McMenamin's Grand Lodge in Forest Grove, Oregon. It is exactly, EXACTLY what we want to do, and so reasonably priced. After that we'll spend a day driving & hiking on the Oregon coast. Also EXACTLY what we want to do.


I'm getting really excited! It is going to be a wonderful time, from start to finish!

My Man.

Happy Birthday, Kaden. I love you!

Horizon Pointe.

I finally took & uploaded some pictures of our new room. I'm really very fond of it.
For More Photos: See Horizon Pointe

Ye Olde Pacific Ocean

Kaden is picking me up from work & we are going to the ocean, with his family, James' family, & another family I don't know as well. I am so excited!! I can't remember last time I was this excited. I don't think I've been to the ocean since September of 2008, I think, which is silly. Also I'm really excited to see James, since he moved to California in June. Kaden kept saying "Picking you up from work & driving to the ocean is like the best part of the whole trip." We used to drive around so much.

Last time we went to this place, The Beachwood, was seven years ago. Kaden and I had been together less than a month; he hadn't even broken up with his other girlfriend yet! That was the first time I met James, and we invited him to move into Kaden's room - it was my plot to move Kaden into my bedroom. We roamed around the beach all night with Kaden's brother Eric, smoking pot and drinking from a bottle of whiskey. Some of the best sex of my life was on the hide-a-bed at The Beachwood.

So I'm thrilled to go back, harboring such fond memories. I am full of joy. I am so grateful to be experiencing the thrill of looking forward to something so purely!

Romantic Getaways.

You know how you romanticize places you have been in your mind? For years I thought of the Imana Colonies in Iowa as the most perfect place in the world, after Cree, Kell & I drove through there on our roadtrip in 2001. Just as I wrote that I realized that I can’t even conjure up the idyllic memory I have of that place. Now I only see when Kaden & I went there in 2007. And it wasn’t as beautiful as I remembered; it was very nice, but not so magical. We were listening to Galaxie 500 & Tonight’s the Night.

Right now the place I want most to go is Death Valley. Kaden & I went there on our roadtrip in 2005. It was September & it felt cooler to put on a flannel shirt than to have bare arms.

Another place I have romanticized to death is West Yellowstone, the town outside of the park, where we stayed in cabins once when I was 10. I only recently found out that Yellowstone is not Kaden’s dream vacation, as it is mine.

We are pseudo-planning our “honeymoon.” In fact I have not even asked for time off work yet - I have not even told anyone except one co-worker that we are even tying the knot. At first we thought we’d just go to Leavenworth because it is easy. But we go there about twice a year, so I’d like to do something more special.

I’d like to drive through Death Valley.

I think I need to go thrift shopping more. Like, a lot more. I hate shopping but I am also not completely satisfied with my wardrobe & style. Although today I am pretty thrilled with my outfit!

fashion concepts.

I am dreaming of creating a "new fall look" or "fashion concept" for myself. This means I spend too much time online. & It probably won't happen. But then again I do have a new affirmation:

Every day physically do something to manifest your dreams.

Should that include shopping? Ha ha ha. Well, I dream of stripes & ruffles & eyelet lace & stirrup leggings & dark wash jeans & prairie dresses & nerdy loafers.

Wheat Fields by Hotel Hell

Field of Daisies by Hotel Hell

Music News U Toucan Use

So, I never consider myself to be "into" roots/americana/alt-country - better to leave the old styles to the old timey music. Plus I'm not hot/new weird america enough, though I would like to be. But, if you happen to listen to KAOS at 6 in the morning, you get your roots/americana/alt-country on.

And, I had forgotten, or failed to recognize, or missed by not being "into" it, that sweet darkness of longing present in that music & nowhere else, not even the true old timey stuff. It reminds me of the late summer turning to autumn when Kaden & I were first "into" each other. This morning was a foggy morning, and I decided to get "into" roots/americana/alt-country. It's nice. I think Kaden would like it too; apparently what is being done in that genre now pretty much surpasses what was being done 7-10 years ago. It seems much deeper & sweeter, but then again, never having been "into" it, I know very little of the past 7-10 years. I enjoyed songs from musicians that I believe to be called Lay Low, The Last of the High Rollers [edit: LOST High Rollers, got it!], and Star Anna?

In other music news, I got "Mortal Mirror" by Quix*o*tic this weekend. I have meant to listen to Quix*o*tic for approximately 10 years, since I saw them at the first Ladyfest. So that's cool. In Olympia they are selling a cassette of a 1995 show at the Midnight Sun featuring Ce Be Barnes Band which had Rachel & Radio & Miranda July. Whoa. I got it & can't wait to hear it! We were trying to keep our stereo system minimal since it is in our housemates' pristine suburban neutral-colored home, and the stereo is big & black, but I think we will have to get the tape deck up there. There are too many good mix tapes we are missing.

Links:
Lay Low
Star Anna
Lost High Rollers
Quix*o*tic

Fondness for Things

I have a fondness for things. The other day I was going through our stuff in Cree’s garage, trying to get rid of more stuff, and I came across a bunch of our kitchen stuff. I MISS using our kitchen stuff. Kaden said that our housemates “Have the kind of kitchen stuff people have who don’t actually cook, stuff your parents buy when you move out.” I have such affection for our specific kitchen utensils, and I sorely miss using them. I have a fondness for Kaden’s things. His things that I have seen float around our lives for so many years. His old binders with words written on and glued to them. From time to time I consider clutter clearing and minimalism, but I love the comfort of unessential things that are always there.

Own Space

Right this second, it's breaking my heart, but in a sweet and desire-filled way, not having my own home space to decorate, style, and exist within. But, it will probably pass.

Also started half-dreaming of having an etsy vintage shoppe. Which I am not allowing to lead immediately to kicking myself for all the stuff I gave away before moving.

It is funny when places are still so much alive in your mind; I always think about it when I go visit my relatives in Illinois, and it's like I haven't been away from their homes for the years that I have been. I feel that way about our old apartment in Bellingham, but the thing is, it is not there waiting for me.

I may be a sucker, but, "What's In It For" by Avi Buffalo gives me a big thrill of infinite possibility. It's rather absurd, but, what can you do. It's also very exciting to suddenly like a band that is both new/current and with members younger than yourself.

Dear Universe

Dear Universe,
I want a small apartment that is just right for Kaden & me, so that we can downsize even more and live a tiny lifestyle, in style.
Thanks!
Liina

Happy & Positive

I'm feeling really happy & positive today - like my life could subtly change for the better real soon. Like I have a clear vision of the world I want to create, and everything I do supports this vision.

The "apartment" built onto my parents house seems to be a fantasy that is slipping away...here we are at the end of July and the plans haven't even been approved. The foundation was supposed to be set by the time we moved, in the first week of June...so that Kaden (my man) and Kevin (my sister Laila's boyfriend) could work on it all summer. The ground has not even been dug out for the foundation yet. So...I think we will be looking at renting pretty soon. I would like my own place. I love Cree & Kristina and have no problems living with them, but, I would like my own place. Shared with Kaden. I think I need more responsibility. When I am without responsibility, my mind is too free to be negative.

Improvements

Things that might improve my quality of life: gauzy curtains, deeply colored walls, furniture in fields.
Things I Love Thursday (as found on galadarling.com)

1. Two mindblowing shows in a row by The Need, in Olympia & Portland. My horoscope said “The time has come for you to receive a blessing from the highest expression of feminine power”, and I think that was IT.
   
2. Hanging baskets overflowing with petunias in Tenino, Washington.
   
3. A new bar of my favorite handmade honeysuckle soap.
   
4. Amaaaaaaaaazing tempeh gyros with garlic-cucumber-yogurt sauce made by my boyfriend; amaaaaaaaaaazing roasted potato mini pizzas with balsamic glaze!!!! also by same boyfriend.
   
5. Ace of Spades by Motorhead.
   
6. Looking at wedding rings made by local artists on Etsy/planning our tiny secret wedding (after 7 years of engagement).
   
7. Helping my mom clutter clear.
   
8. Health week! Massage, yoga, counseling & asthma meds!
   
9. My Alicia Silverstone toiletries case, ha ha ha. www.amazon.com/Ecotools I love being a low maintenence girl – the simple contents make me feel secure.
   
10. The hot pink hairbrush I have used for the past 16 years!!!
    
11. Additionally: the yoga class at Living Spirit Yoga that made me feel far better than the massage I got on Monday! I am still looking for the right class for me, though - I might like something a little more spiritual.
    

Inspirational

I keep an InDesign document breaking down the work I have to do at my job (I run digital printing machines at a book printing company). On the second page of this document I keep my goals for each day of the week. Below the goals I keep all the inspirational bits I read online and want to remember, including my weekly Free Will Astrology horoscopes, and my affirmations. It kinda keeps me going. I also print a copy to keep at home or in my bag. It looks like this:

(you can click to see a larger version on flickr)
Some of this stuff came from Gala Darling and Laura Jane Faulds, and some from other sources that I do not remember, so thanks to all of them!

I can't help but wonder.

I can't help but wonder if moving to Olympia was a mistake; if we should have stayed in Bellingham or gone somewhere new altogether. I wanted to be closer to my family & my BFF sooooooooooo badly when I was in Bellingham for (almost) 2 years. Now we are living with my BFF & seeing my family daily, and, I miss how we were hermits. I miss long mornings & evenings cooking & reading & enjoying records.

I read blogs where people's lives seem so romantic. Maybe it's their photography styles & corners that are romantic. I feel that I lack a certain element of femininity. And I know there is nothing wrong with that. It wouldn't feel right on me; doesn't feel right. So why would I want it so much? Why do I make things like this?

On a Good Day by Hotel Hell

At Home with Liina

For many years I have pored over home design books & blogs. Sometimes I wish so much that my style was bold & angular & quirky, but it isn't; it's round & romantic & quirky. It's mine. Soon I am going to take some pictures of the rooms where Kaden & I are living now. I love them both; they're both filled with "our stuff". But it's especially great how Kaden took all the sort of lodge-style stuff & I took all the kinda frilly stuff (frilly is an overstatement). It's like we separated out the "masculine" & "feminine" sides of our decor theme. Here are some of my favorite parts of our combined decor in our old apartment in Bellingham. It was pretty much the best apartment ever & really exemplified our style.

this was kinda my special area, an altar to some degree
but I've never been good with maintaining altars.

the best table in the woooooooooorld!

Return to Olympia

I want to use this blog again. I originally created it to write about my move first move away from my hometown, from Olympia to Bellingham in 2008. But when I actually moved, I didn't have internet access at home and had a busy stand-up job at Copy Source. But it was good that way, it was great to spend almost 2 years essentially away from The Internet.

Now I am back in Olympia, back at my old job at Gorham Printing, and living in the most suburban neighborhood I can imagine. And I wanna write about it.